here's the deal. I decided to my hybrid...I always wanted a bike but always chicken'd out on getting one. Some of my friends are getting bikes and i figured since we are trying to buy a house that getting a used F3i or F4 would be a cheap way of getting around as an alternate means of transportation and it would be fun for drives on nice days and what not......lets even leave out the fact that I really think I would enjoy riding (like as much as I can).

I have been reading as much as i can and went for a ride with my wife's crazy cousin.....and as much as he scared the crap out of me I can't deny that just being on the bike was a rush

I want to experience that again (although I don't need to go that fast).

Guy I'm cool with around the corner gets a brand new 929 RR and brings it by. The wife and I speak about it and she is totally all for me getting a bike (@ one point she said she wanted on two but she's a little scared now). I have 4 year old (turns 5 in Feb).

Everything is kewl right.....wrong.

We found out a little bit before Christmas that she was pregnant again with our second child. She now has a complete change of heart. I mean she is on the whole....."You are not getting a bike", thing.

I'm selling my hybrid to get into a house and hopefully by the end of this year or next year I'll be buying a EVO (most likely used) so the bike is going to be my main mode of transportation on days when its okay to ride....I'll be working off hours soon @ work (3pm-12am).

? is how do I get her on the same page as me. I mean when it boils down to it I'd rather have support me getting a bike instead of being mad all the time (I'd rather not have the drama)....my thing is we have a child....having a second doesn't really change anything. The risks and the rewards are the same as they were before we found out we'd be parents for the 2nd time.

How should I approach this for people who are married and been in similar situations or people in relationships with their better half and experienced this.....yes single people can comment too.

I don't want it to get to where i say I'm getting a bike I really don't care how you feel.

Like i said she was on board before but now she's done a 180.

 

man no replies. Was my post that long. lol.

 

Yeah, your post was kinda long Anyways, at first my wife was against me getting a bike, we have no kids but she was scared for me, worried about me crashing etc etc etc. Once I started showing her that I was responsible, taking the MSF class, researching the diff brands of gear, reading books, getting license, then just doing overall research on diff bikes she saw that I was really into the sport, that I was being responsible about the whole thing. She changed her mind after that.
Have you asked her what has changed her mind?

 

well, i am a single guy but i was in a similar situation but with my parents. I am in my early 20's and when i told my parents i was getting a bike they freaked out and told me NO WAY!! They said that i was going to endanger my life and specially being young i would maybe start trying to do stupid stunts and stuff like that. Well, i still went out and looked for a bike, in the mean time everyday i would tell them a little more about bike riding and how it could be safe if we ride within our limits. I went to DMV and got passed my writing test and got my permit. As time went by and the more i talked to them about how responsible i was going to be with the bike they finally decided it was ok, they were even helping look for a bike!!!
- i think you are right in taking her opions into consideration and she is doing the same. I think after you guys talk over the safety and maybe take a MSF course she might change her mind. Good luck and safe riding if you do get a bike!!!

 

I don't understand. Why can't you drive an evo daily? The riding season isn't even all that long up there. Try simple, honest reasoning backed up w/ facts. Help her make an informed opinion. Also try getting in slowly w/ maybe a light cruiser. Something real plain looking and very quiet. Maybe that would get her interested. Take her for a couple puts around the neighborhood. Stress proper safety gear. The emphasis is on including the SO. Trust me, no matter how uninterested someone may seem if you can get them on the damn thing and ride cleanly they will soon be at ease and enjoying themselves. Pretty soon they're going to ask you to switch when you stop

 

It's hard to give good advice to you because you have children to think about. A few guys that I work with gave up riding because they had children. The kids came first to them, but they really weren't in to it like some get. My fiancee was against me getting my first one, and second one. After she realized that was my thing, it changed.

She now has her own bike, and has been riding for about a year and a half. I also have a few other friends that have wive's that ride on their own too. One couple, for example, have two young children. This guy rides 3 mile wheelies with her on the back. Sure it's unsafe, but that's for the rider to decide. Anyway, his oldest kid is getting into moto-X, and his wife has her own bike.

If I were you, I would'nt do anything without her approval. If she's not happy, you're not happy. If it was meant to be, she'll come around. Maybe when the kids get a couple years older, things will change.

 

I don't have a wife...yet, but I do have a problem with parents, if one can relate?

Even the mere mentioning of the word motorcycle around my parents will cause them to have siezures. Seriously, it's that bad around them. One of their good friend recently lost their son to an accident. So it's still fresh on their minds. My parents do know about my riding activities though and simply said as long as I lived at home, I will not be owning one.

So I'm moving in with my sister soon.

I know that didn't help you any Hurrel, but you just have to show your wife that you're a responsible adult and that you're not wreckless. Having a wife and kid, you really do need to think things out before you do decide to hop on one. Like every rider will tell, no matter how much you respect your bike and how responsible you are, you can not control that careless blonde that's applying makeup in rush hour traffic.

Be smart. Ride safe. And always plan your routes. Avoid highly stressed areas. And whatever you do, never ever ride alone!

 

Hi everyone. this is s14hybrid('the wife') I'm having password issues hence the posting under the hubby's name.

Hurell is right in saying that I was on board with him about getting a bike. I'll be honest before I was just excited for him and I guess I got comfortable. It's not that I didn't think about our son when I was excited about him getting a bike but when I found out that we're having another one, it kinda kicked me in the head and put things in perspective.

I know Hurell is responsible and if I were to agree with him buying a bike then he knows he would have to take the courses and what not to help him be more aware and responsible. But it's really not him that I'm worried about but other drivers and he knows that. I wish he wouldn't paint this image of me that I'm some bitchy non compromising wife and it's not really like that. I've gone through everything in my head. He thinks that I don't think about it but I do on a daily basis. Give me some credit here Hurell, I have thought about changing my mind. You didn't have to come here and do this.

 

Not painting any other picture beyond one's wife who is very concern'd. (I'm posting to myself lol).

I was asking the advice of some experienced riders. I'm sure not everyone on here had a smooth time telling someone who cared about them about wanting to ride.

You seem so unapproachable about the subject sometimes so I was looking for new ways to bring the issue to you to make you a little more comfortable. The risks are the same with 1 or 10 children.

You make it sound as if you never thought about it before (risks) but I always thought about it. To me nothing has changed. I even know routes to get to work without having to get into the city until the last couple of miles.

I'm not making you out to be a monster. I'm sure no one here thinks that. No need to defend. I simply want you to be okay with it because I have a feeling it will be as fun and fullfilling as my car obsession.....maybe even more.

For the gentleman who asked why not drive the EVO daily. If/When I buy a newer car I am not driving it everyday because everyday wear and tear on a car is ridiculous. I hate repainting a car and in a week you have rock chips or someone careless decides that you car is a grocery cart stopper.

Plus I'd have big plans for it and keepign the miles off would be nice. I ran my ITR in to the ground driving it everyday.

Anyway Mia like i said.....not monster painting. Concern'd individual regarding my safety yes, but you aren't a monster. I'm allowed to be a little frustrated with your unwillingness to talk about it right.

 

Okay we're giving a lil too much information about our lives to strangers. cut the conversation.

 

Back to our regular scheduled programming.

Anyone else's opinions....or anything anyone would like to post so big bro....I mean wifie's mind is a little more @ ease. lol

 

I will give you a little background of my family first, so you will understand it better. When I was 18 months old, my dad got into a serious motorcycle crash. He hit a patch of grave and fell. He sat there for 10 mins and no one helps or called anyone. Lucky a doctor stopped and saved his life. They said that if he stayed there any longer, he would have died. After that, he did not ride a motorcycle for 16 years.

When I told my mom that I was going to get a motorcycle (a sportbike too, my dad rides harleys). She turned and walked away. After months, I still wanted one. I explained to her that I wanted one bad, and I was going to get one. Before she could say "not under this house" I started to explain what I was going to do to protect myself from a crash. I explain that I was going to wear a helmet at all times and have gear on at all times too. I was going to get my license too.

Another problem was that she did not understand much about bikes. I sat her down and explained the goods and bads (there is always bads, so it is better that you explain it than a dumbass that does not know anything about bikes that says dumb myths about bikes and scares her). I answered all her questions and she seemed to understand it better.

Now I am here and I have had my bike for almost two years. I have seen good and bad stuff on the road. But I am still riding and still loving it. If it was too dangerous to ride, I would have stopped. I live in a city with a lot of old people, you have to learn how to deal with them and other things.


Now, I think that you both should take the MSF course. Why? you both will learn the pros and cons of a bike and learn to ride them too. It will teach you to drive around riders and see what they are going though when riding. I understand that you have kids, but learn actually how 'dangerous' a bike and see if you still like it.

when I bought my bike, I had a girlfriend of 4 1/2 years. She did not want me to get one because of the stuff she has seen/read. After I got it and started riding with her on the back, she loved it. She saw that it is not as dangerous as she was told/read.

EDIT:when I type long replies, I sometimes confuse people (even though I prove-read it like 5 times) If you do not understand something I said, just ask me to explain it or retype it.

 

You type long journal entries like me. I understand what you mean. I want to take Motorcycle training course next month. She's pregnant so I don't think she'll be up to it. I can ask her (or wait until she see's this post and respond accordingly. lol.


Thanks for the advice.

 

<TABLE WIDTH="90%" CELLSPACING=0 CELLPADDING=0 ALIGN=CENTER><TR><TD>Quote, originally posted by Apex i ITR &raquo;</TD></TR><TR><TD CLASS="quote">She's pregnant so I don't think she'll be up to it. </TD></TR></TABLE>

damn, I read that too on me


Take the course and see if you like it first. Some people want to ride a bike and when they do, they do not like it.

and, I forgot in the first post. Good luck with the baby.

 

Thanks. I think I'll like it but that's also why I want to do asap. I don't want to sit here and want one so bad and struggle to convince the wife its okay only to not like it @ all.

 

So, this is what it's like to be married huh...

 

&lt;---Friend who just got 600F4

I don't have any advice, but you know my situation H. I am going to take the classes and get my license and know my limits, but all I can say is:

This is WAY better than my Type-R!!!

Don't push it. I mean you are a grown *** man and you can do what ever it is that you want to do and I know you will choose correctly.

 

She's okay with me taking the course. I'm kinda softening her up a little bit. She seems a little more inclined. She asked a few things like if she was cool with it she doesn't want me to ride @ night for the 1st little while.

I'm kewl with that because I'd want to get used to it.




Modified by Apex i ITR at 7:02 AM 1/10/2004

 

<TABLE WIDTH="90%" CELLSPACING=0 CELLPADDING=0 ALIGN=CENTER><TR><TD>Quote, originally posted by detaude &raquo;</TD></TR><TR><TD CLASS="quote">So, this is what it's like to be married huh...</TD></TR></TABLE>

To have someone care about you and look out for your well being.....yes.