RR98ITR

Last night, as we occassionally do, our club, TCO, Touring Club of Oregon, an instituition more than 40 years old, held it's meeting at the indoor kart track.

You know how bad you Jones after a race weekend (after you've gotten over being exhausted)? You'd think that a trip to the karts would be just the thing to help. But I was kinda wishy washy about going - and I don't know why. When I was into riding bicycles really heavy, I'd rarely take off more than 2 days, but there were alot of days when I just didn't feel like riding, went riding anyway, and after the burn in thought "boy, I'm glad I made myself ride today". That's the kind of night it turned out to be at karts.

Duane and I, and a guy going by the name of Guido, were swapping fast laps. We had a small enough group that we didn't split into qualifying heats, we just ran practice, qualifying, and the race with reverse grid. Duane and I were put to the back of the grid and so we tried to think of ways to.......cheat. Duane thought that maybe we could start from the pre-grid since the timing strip was just past there - we could jump out just before everybody else came by. When we discounted that plan because we were unsure about the warmup lap counting, we discussed working thru the pack cleanly like we ought to. The call to mount up ended the discussion there.

I noticed an as yet unoccupied kart on the front row and just took it - Fred (who was gridded there) was ambivalent enough to let me. I hollered back at Duane that I'd decided his plan sucked!

It was not to be that easy though. We did one lap and then got staged per the grid sheet. Duane, who'd somehow found himself on the front row too, was put to the back with me and Guido.

Start! If I remember right, it was not long after the start that I got in a tangle and had to get out of the kart to get free. Race done - right? Nein! Somebody else got into a good tangle, and the karts were put to reduced power for 30-45 seconds. Mine seemed to have unusually high relative speed, and I was able to pass everybody before full power was restored. I did of course stop passing when I came to the flag station with the waving yellow (coincidentally after I'd taken the lead). What followed was a carefully managed negotiaton of lappers while Duane (who I'm pretty sure followed my example to only slightly lesser degree) slowly reeled me in (his fast lap being a tenth faster than mine - and both of us off the fast Kart Racer kids in the other group by up to 2 full seconds). By the next to last lap Duane was in position and made his move while I was working on a couple guys in front. He hit hard, but one of the other guys crabbed his kart and took Duane with him. That was that.

Imagine my surprise then when I was accused of passing under yellow. I explained that I did all my passing before the yellow flag station. They countered that it was a full course yellow since 1) we were on reduced power, and 2) there's only one flag station. I then tried the simplified version of TCO rules: "He who gets there first". That didn't work either. We all laughed and "that was fun"'d, and everybody headed to a nearby Roadhouse to hydrate. Everyone but me.

As I was walking out the door, I realized my keys were no longer with me. I looked all over. I waited for the next session to stop so I could check my kart. I asked everybody still there. I got the kart crew to help me search the whole track. NO KEYS! At about the point I'd given up and started thinking about plan B, Eastman (one of the most brilliant rhetorical minds I've ever encountered) appears in the distance swinging my keys. He'd picked them up during a slow lap and forgotten about them. Later at the Roadhouse, somebody says "hey Bill, didn't you pick up some keys out on the track?" Somebody else says "maybe that's why Scott's not here."

What really sucks about this is that I'd given disproportionate thought to my pant selection and had seemingly good reason for the choice I made. I'll never make this particular mistake again!

I had to endure Bill's telling me that this whole thing with the keys was God working thru Man to punish me for cheating. If you knew Bill and TCO you would appreciate that this was somewhat unlikely. I am thankful that they didn't play lets move his car on me.

Bottom line: boy am I glad I made myself go drive that night. Joneses begone.

Scott, who thinks cheating with a bunch of cheaters who didn't think to cheat like you did fast enough isn't really cheating.....it's racing....uh-oh, the Joneses are back....

johng

LMAO

bulldog_RS20

Another podium finish? What a Bastard!

Honda318dx

I'm going to have to try this karting stuff out sometime...

Knestis

The night before my wedding, we had a bachelor/bachelorette party at the karting track in the little town where my parents live - beautiful Polson, Montana. Most of the guests on my side of the aisle were racers, so it seemed like a good idea. A dozen of us each dropped a $50 on tickets and got in line. By the time we were done:

* My brother had a tangle with one of my guests, tore off a wheel and was banned from the track "for life" - he also ran over his own sunglasses although, luckily, they were not on his face at the time

* My crazy cousin Adam from Greece spun and/or crashed more that was going to be tolerated and was (you guessed) banned for life - between us, I was glad since he was scarin' me silly with his Athens cab driver style

* The women all got tired, gave us their tickets, and went home

* Me, the guy who drove the rally car that I rode in, and another racing friend had lap after lap of wicked duals, only to be eventually schooled by a cute, skinny, 12-year-old girl - I blame the weight difference but who knows

* We got tired, went out for beer and fries, and gave the 12-year-old girl our last few tickets - she would be 20 this summer and probably has a sprint car ride somewhere in the midwest

Kirk

Mike_C

Dude!!! Cliff's notes!

Willard

read it damit

Mike_C

I did damnit! And I still would have rathered cliff's notes. I guess us kids growing up today are too spoiled with that kinda stuff

jdmspooner

JMU1337, LMAO


[Modified by jdmspooner, 4:38 PM 6/28/2002]

manveer

I lost my keys while karting once...after looking at every part of the track and anywhere else I had been, I busted out my spare key and went home. Later that night I found that my keys had ended up in my back pocket somehow, barely staying in there.

fastfour

Cheating ownz if everyone else is doing it

Zach---> Who once put a dude into the tire wall and made him bleed for cheating while karting at Traxx in Mukilteo Damn those black flags.

Big Phat R

LMAO!

Good story