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Virginity, Relationship

 
Old 02-19-2003, 06:58 PM
  #1  
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Default Virginity, Relationship

I made this Post, not in a perverse way, but to be debated, and discussed openly and maturely.
Im basing myself on the Forum Guidelines.
- Relationship/interpersonal interaction discussions from a moral/ethical standpoint
In order for the Thread not to get Locked, You cannot Talk about:
- Threads discussing sexual acts, positions, techniques etc.


Well, Im 18. Going on 19 in March. I met my current girlfriend in Nov. We got to know each other but I never Officially asked her until March to be my Girlfriend. So we have been together about 1 year. We are both Virgins. The Way I was Raised and Im sure most of you guys too, is to Wait until you were married until giving away your virginity. This is my First Serious Relationship and I really feel like I want to marry this girl. I have only had 3 girlfriends and none of the 2 prior girlfriends would be considered Serious.
Having Said that.
We havent had Intercourse yet, but I dont know how far we have gone according to Virginty. I will say that, I have manually stimulated her.
I Really DONT KNOW, Is that too far if you want to wait till you get married before having Intercourse? What is too far until your not considered a virgin? And How Long did You wait? Did you consider waiting to get married?
All the guys I work with and friends tell me , Test Drive the Car before you buy in.
I Really Want to... But what happens After you do have Sex? Ive heard the Relationship Changes, not just in the physical sense , but as in Emotionally.
In your own experience. Did it help our take away from your relationship after Sex.
Im scared things will change, And things are so great right now, but they could be even greater with Sex. Anyways This is and Open Conversation about Relationships and Sex, But this thread is skirting the Guidelines, Dont get it locked
Im really just looking for Info.
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Old 02-19-2003, 07:01 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Diegolude)

just wait for the right girl, and make sure shes special....
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Old 02-19-2003, 07:13 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (DR. ON POINT)

Well, Did You wait?
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Old 02-19-2003, 07:18 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Diegolude)

she was. I was far from it. now we're married.
 
Old 02-19-2003, 07:18 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Diegolude)

I waited till I believed I found the right girl. Long story short the girl I believed to be the right girl after 6 months turned itno a ***** and I found out everything she told me was a lie. I got played. Biggest mistake of my life. I seriously regret meeting that girl every day of my life since then.


My advice...... wait till u know its right and u are positive.
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Old 02-19-2003, 07:53 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (DR. ON POINT)

well...since you are only 18, and you wanna stay virgin....
I'd say DO NOT DO IT!!!

SOOOO much will change in your life in the next few years...
keep it real with her...
and if she is still around in 3-4 years....

marry that shiet and hit it


[Modified by skunkintegra, 10:54 PM 2/19/2003]
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Old 02-19-2003, 07:59 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (skunkintegra)

Good advice skunkintegra...

I agree.
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Old 02-19-2003, 08:00 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Diegolude)

just stick her dude. the guys at work really r right. u need to test drive it. theres chicks out there that just suck in the sack. what if u wait, get married, stick her on the honeymoon and it sux. i guarantee it will feel good but if shes got no sexual desire and not kinky, shes worthless. u will end up in divorce and b4 divorce u will have a mistress on the side that does the kinky **** to u that u want.
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Old 02-19-2003, 08:02 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (hondaatwsu)

just stick her dude. the guys at work really r right. u need to test drive it. theres chicks out there that just suck in the sack. what if u wait, get married, stick her on the honeymoon and it sux. i guarantee it will feel good but if shes got no sexual desire and not kinky, shes worthless. u will end up in divorce and b4 divorce u will have a mistress on the side that does the kinky **** to u that u want.
its staments like this why 50% of all marriages fail......... there is more to marriage than just sex
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Old 02-19-2003, 08:05 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (DR. ON POINT)

just stick her dude. the guys at work really r right. u need to test drive it. theres chicks out there that just suck in the sack. what if u wait, get married, stick her on the honeymoon and it sux. i guarantee it will feel good but if shes got no sexual desire and not kinky, shes worthless. u will end up in divorce and b4 divorce u will have a mistress on the side that does the kinky **** to u that u want.

its staments like this why 50% of all marriages fail......... there is more to marriage than just sex
True however sex plays a big part in a marriage. If your missing that aspect of your marriage, it wont last a long time either. I think age plays a bigger role in why most marriages fail.
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Old 02-19-2003, 08:05 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Mr. S)

make sure she is the right one. I regret losing it to the girl i did.
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Old 02-19-2003, 08:05 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Diegolude)

The Way I was Raised and Im sure most of you guys too, is to Wait until you were married until giving away your virginity.
Haha thats funny. I lost mine to the IR ****. And been bokn ever since.

Waiting

Getting as much experience with different ladies as you can.
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Old 02-19-2003, 08:08 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (DR. ON POINT)

its staments like this why 50% of all marriages fail......... there is more to marriage than just sex
this comin from a guy that got hurt by a girl that played his ***.
my statement has nothin to do with marriage. i firmly believe u should have sex b4 u get married. would u buy a car without test driving it??? i think not. test drive the girl, if not u could b in for a big surprise. i say take ur twisted girly thinkin elsewhere cause i said "sex b4 marriage". i didnt say sex during marriage. get some glasses and learn to read.
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Old 02-19-2003, 08:09 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (DR. ON POINT)

"just wait for the right girl, and make sure shes special...."

You'll never know who's the right one until some big cup of bullsh_t happens.
well, for me that is.

Agree, save it for marrage if you can.
I was 16
I personally think there's no way to controll underage sex,
cant really enforce it unless you got busted.
Actually i felt much closer with her after the "first night".
really, i dont know, sex can be like some sore of magic dose
but it could turn into darkest nightmare if not handle right.
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Old 02-19-2003, 08:13 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (iam7head)

sex also changed my way viewing the world..
She was mistaken that she got a baby, what a reality
check for both of us..
.........
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Old 02-19-2003, 08:17 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (iam7head)

sex also changed my way viewing the world..
She was mistaken that she got a baby, what a reality
check for both of us..
.........
major reality check
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Old 02-19-2003, 08:29 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Diegolude)

20 years old, non-attatched, not a virgin.

I like having sex with girls. Girls can be amazing at sex, girls can be horrible at sex, girls can be blah at sex. The girl I marry must be amazing at sex. Any truly healthy relationship needs to have some passion in it if you ask me.

Sure it's fine to wait a while to sleep with someone so you know what they're like and become attatched to them for reasons other than the purely physical. At some point though I feel that it's healthy to start sleeping together. Last school year I lived with a friend of mine and his girlfriend, and one other friend. The couple had been together since they were 15, exchanged "promise rings" and were waiting til marriage. They were 19, they acted like they were 70 and had been married for more than half of their lives. That's not healthy for a couple of 19 year-olds. I'm a firm believer that most teenagers aren't capable of picking a mate or making life decisions like who they're going to marry, and I feel truly sorry for anyone who gets into a relationship as a teenager and then gets married to the person at a relatively young age without having sex first.

I've had a one-night stand before, there's nothing really wrong with it if you ask me. Obviously if a girl is "girlfriend material" then I'm more inclined to wait a few weeks/months/etc but if I'm with some chick and we're in the mood, might as well enjoy ourselves.
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Old 02-19-2003, 08:34 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (SOHC_MShue)

my own thought:

for me sex isnt anything special. its more or less a way to have fun for me. after having sex with my gf, i think we both felt closer. but we both know that we do it for both of us to have fun. nothing more, nothing less. so if you want to, then id do it. no reason to wait. after all, whats the difference? all you have to do is make sure you put condoms on, and any other form of protection.
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Old 02-19-2003, 08:38 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Diegolude)

man i was in your position with my gf after about 5 months. we were into eachother so much that everything was perfect and we were conserned that sex might ruin what we really had. so my advice is take it slow and see where it goes. first begin with the innocent things then pregress to the more sexual and intimit things. after you guys get really comfortable with eachother and she is not hiding her body or tending to be shy then you know she is ready and you need to either step up or step off. sex changes the relationship majorly. like one of the other guys says its great to have a girl who is down to have sex often and is kinky as hell then a girl who only is willing to do it missionary and not anything else cause she thinks its straight nasty. sex will be there when your at the peak of your relationship and itll be there at the lowest point in your relationship to boost it back on track if u want to then go for it dude. 4 reals use a condom, dont trust the pull out method cause its scary as **** when u hear her say "im late". hope this helps
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Old 02-19-2003, 09:17 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Cali95Gs-r)

Thanks, hehe Actually Ive talked to my GF, She is hornier then I am, We went snowboarding this Presidents day and we stayed in the car half the time and She Just got on Top, She pretty much has a bigger sexual appetite then me, I think. Im going to try wait. Anyways How old were you guys when you lost it.
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Old 02-19-2003, 09:21 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Diegolude)

do it just dont let "it" take over....

14 when i lost mine, 22 now
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Old 02-19-2003, 09:30 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (phreaker)

I waited till i was 19 to lose my virginity and i lost it to a girl that i was deeply in love with and wanted to marry. We dated seriously for about 2yrs then broke up, and having sex WILL change a relationship. Also, by her being your first you will always have an attachment to her and you'll always judge other girls by using her as your standard. As my story goes, me and my x-gf recently got back together 2 months ago after 2yrs away from each other and honestly im glad i lost it to her. She's the only girl ive ever cared about and i do plan on marrying her still. Just think it out long and hard before you decided to lose your virginity, emotionally it can rip you apart depending on how strong strong, emotionally, of a person you are.
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Old 02-19-2003, 11:11 PM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Diegolude)

I read something about this once, that I thought was interesting.

When you get married or you get in a close long term relationship.

the last thing to fade, will be the sexual attraction.

what will happen, is that you start to like the girl less and less. then when that starts happening, your phsical attraction fades.

this, try a girl out before you marry her. is total horse crap.

if marriage is based on sex, life would be a lot different.

if you really love a girl, and she loves you with everything. then anything can be worked out.

if i was in a relationship, i would much rather have a wife with a awesome personality, totally cares for me, is honest, is a good person and just is kick ***, and is totally bland in bed. versus having a girl that rocks my world in bed, and i dont really like when i wake up to her in the morning laying next to me.
is 30 minutes of pleasure 1-2 times a day, filled with unhappiness and what not all day. better than happiness and lvoe all day, with ok sex 1-2 a day.

and even bad sex, is still good sex. it is not like it takes freaking magical skill for her to lay down and put her legs around you and let you do your business.

the relationship does change. it really depends upon the persons past.
for me whatever emotions i am feeling at the time will grow.

if i like her, then i will like/love her more
if i dont like her, then i will grow to hate her more

most likely you will gain more as a person if you hold off, compared to having sex early on.

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Old 02-20-2003, 02:36 AM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Diegolude)

Most people (if not all) would rather have lost it in some other way, or regret losing it...
 
Old 02-20-2003, 05:12 AM
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Default Re: Virginity, Relationship (Diegolude)

Personally I was 18 my first time. I was never really brought up w/ a 'wait til you're married attitude' - I don't think sex is everything, but I also don't think it's nothing. I do think your first time should be with someone you care about tho - not just some with some drunk chick when you're drunk too. If both of you care about each other, this girl sounds like a good candidate for your first experience.

Paul
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