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Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Old 12-04-2018, 12:05 AM
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Default Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Besides family, how do you guys decide who comes to your wedding dinner?

By how often you interact?

For those who are married.....how many did you guys end up inviting?
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Old 12-04-2018, 01:58 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

The cutoff is tough because itís a slippery slope. Look at your venue and budget and work backwards.

We did ours ours a bit differently and invited 0 family and did a 3 day party in Asheville with 40 friends, a much better time.
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Old 12-04-2018, 02:15 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

How much money do you have to spend on food for people you don’t really talk to?

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Old 12-04-2018, 05:23 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

So when we got married, being that my wife is from Central America and has a huge A$$ family, her mom justified inviting all these damn people, mind you the wife and I were paying for this, no help from parents.
We were looking at having 200 + people, now my invite list was only like 40, so there's that.

We ended up having a destination wedding and invited everyone under the sun, we did however have a huge wedding shower/party here for those who couldn't make it.
We ended up having 70 + come to our destination wedding, it was nuts.
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Old 12-04-2018, 05:28 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

It is all subjective and you are going to get 280472389742 different answers. You really just need to draw the line somewhere. And if people get offended they weren't invited to your wedding, you probably didn't want them there anyways.
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Old 12-04-2018, 05:29 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Our rule besides family was we both have to know them. Like, you shouldn't be meeting people at your wedding. Rare circumstances would be a family member/super good friend that lives on the other side of the country's new serious significant other, etc.

We ended up having maybe 130 guests and it was way better than BIL's wedding that was like 250+
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Old 12-04-2018, 06:23 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

We chose to avoid this question entirely and had a destination wedding with only our parents, siblings, groomsmen/bridesmaids and their spouses. I think we had like 22 people total, including us and the whole wedding cost less than $6k in Costa Rica.

Recently one of my Hmong friends got married...they had to cap their venue at 300 people and had a hard time doing so. I couldn't name 300 people i know and even if i could, all i see are $$$ (dollar signs) knowing that each guest is like $75+/each. Last time i spoke to him, he was already north of $50k on the wedding.
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Old 12-04-2018, 06:34 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Originally Posted by Takashi1978 View Post
Besides family, how do you guys decide who comes to your wedding dinner?

By how often you interact?

For those who are married.....how many did you guys end up inviting?
you donít, your wife decides

just make every response, ďwhatever you want hunny, itís your wedding.Ē That way you donít have to do anything
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Old 12-04-2018, 06:39 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

I've seen it be super tough and very rough for my "ethnic" friends who've married white people and like I mentioned, even with my wedding.

A lot of those cultures tend to want to invite everyone they've ever known and it's more for the parents to ball and floss out in front of their friends.
Have Korean buddy who got married to a white chick, til this day, there is still issues between them because the wife's family paid for the wedding but didn't understand why there had to be so many people invited from the grooms side.

Hell, even for my youngest SIL's quince, there were 200 people there, that's nuts to me.
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:02 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

You add who is going to pay for their way, and who is just here to eat.

It will cost you $25 per person (pick your cost per head). Are you getting a gift that is $25 or greater?

There are the exceptions like your old 80 year old uncle. But that should be the rule for the other 90%.
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:04 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Where are having a wedding for $25/pp?
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:06 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Yea $25 WTF! Catering from McDonald's and in someone's yard?!
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:06 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Originally Posted by The GreenD16 View Post
Where are having a wedding for $25/pp?
Chuck E Cheese
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:07 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Originally Posted by The GreenD16 View Post
Where are having a wedding for $25/pp?
I'm OG, remember.. What does it cost today on average?
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:09 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

I'd say $300 a head if you get a standard venue/catering.
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:09 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Originally Posted by BauleyCivic View Post
I'd say $300 a head if you get a standard venue/catering.
Wow...srs?
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:11 AM
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:15 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

No wonder people don't get married anymore.

2018 Chevy Tahoe RST or wedding?
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:17 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Originally Posted by GoLowDrew View Post
2018 Chevy Tahoe RST or wedding?
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:19 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

hell, we even went out to a white trash-ish area by the water thinking we could get a deal, their quote was, $55 a head for outdoors(No tent), Cookout food and Coors Light.

BWHAHAHAHAHAHHH
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:21 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Our wedding was at a pretty nice resort out your way. Those numbers in the links are a little off from what we spent.

Wedding cost can vary a great amount. Sure, you can do it for $15k, but it can easily cost $100k too, depending on a lot of factors.
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:24 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

We've been to 80k to 10k weddings, I'm a 10k wedding kind of guy all the way!!
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:25 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Looks like I'm way behind the times.

But back to the topic. In my case, I believe my cost was $18 or $23 per person (and we invited 300 people). IIRC, total cost was $13K for the entire wedding.

So I got a crock pot $100 from one person. A blender $50. That's winning. So that's how you decide who to "invite."

I think there were about 10-15 people that just "showed up" and brought nothing. Like nothing and just here to eat. I don't even know who they were. So it kind of balance it out.
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:51 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

Our wedding was cheap, but it was also small-town NC. "Open invitation" = **** was in the local paper. Come if you want, on top of the 150+ paper invitations we sent out. Country club reception on the riverfront (again, small town). I believe it was 13k total, with over half of that covering the beer and wine.

Not what we wanted at all, but we had a good time.
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Old 12-04-2018, 07:56 AM
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Default Re: Getting married! How do you decide who is coming to your wedding?

We just got back from ours and man was it a bitch getting it all set up in the end. I donít envy you

Ours was growing out of control from friends and family so we moved it to Hawaii and only the people who truly wanted to come did. Problem solved.
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